TEENAGE DIRTBAG
by YIANN
Summary: Garfield's crush on Raven has grown over the years. Now he has to find the courage to tell her.
1. A nous la liberte

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TEEN TITANS (SADLY)

 **TEENAGE DIRTBAG  
**

CHAPTER 1: A NOUS LA LIBERTE

I get into the shower quickly to get away from the bathrooms' cold tiles under my feet. The hot water feels amazing on my new scars, a lovely gift from Slade. I feel so tired but energetic at the same time, the adrenaline of the battle rushing through my body. Well, nothing a spliff can't fix. Now I now I'm not supposed to be smoking since I am a hero and a role model for many kids out there, but come on, who am I kidding, no kid would aspire to be a green, pointy-eared shape shifter. It relaxes me and stops all the thoughts, which is a good thing since they primarily consist of sadness, food and Raven.

I've had a a crush on the dark Titan since the age of thirteen, except from the short period of time that I liked Terra, thinking she liked me back (turns out she just wanted to destroy the team-story of my life). Sadly, when I try to show her my affections, my brain goes on vacation to Hawaii and I end up saying some stupid joke to tease her. That would be acceptable if I was in kindergarden, the problem is that I am a man of seventeen years. The only thing that makes me-kinda-less sad is that I at least look like one. I used to be the smallest one of the group, but now I stand at six feet, Kori still beating me by a little though. I also have some scruff (which I take huge pride into) and my hair is shorter on the sides. Raven hasn't grown much, being a cute 5 foot 4 (she would kill me if she knew I call her cute). I think she is the reason that my most popular porn site search is "petite", dark hair required. I sooo dig the whole goth thing she has going on, with her jet-black hair that reach just under her shoulder blades, her dead-pale skin and the red crystal under her hairline. The look she gives me when I do something stupid-her raised eyebrow and seductive slash pitying look in her eyes- gets me every time.

I get out of the shower before I get hard and run into my room. It's not as bad as it used to be, now a little bit more tidy, with Gorillaz and The Doors posters on the wall, a lava lamp that Kori got me for my birthday, a bank bed and red fairy lights. You can also call it "Stoner Paradise" , as Vic playfully points out, being the only person that knows about my occasional weed smoking. I am a nature's child, I can't help it. I start putting my clothes back on, but I hear someone at my door. By the smell I know it's her, that book paper- tea leaves and rain scent is distinct. `Coming` I say and open the door in my Taz underwear. She is standing there, wearing a black strappy shirt, black pyjama shorts and no socks. Her arms are crossed on her chest, making her small boobs stand out even more. Fuck she is so sexy, which obviously ruins all of my chances with her (if I even had any). She looks at me up and down and I immediately become self-conscious of the hair on my chest and down my navel. She blushes a little and my lower stomach flutters. `Lunch is ready, and put some clothes on`, she says quietly. I'm one step away from grabbing her face and kissing her senseless, like I always fantasize, but of course never do. I'm not only afraid of the consequences it will have on our team and friendship, but mostly I'm terrified of her reaction, my rejection and exile to another dimension. I then realize I'm just standing there staring at her. She looks into my eyes and then floats away gracefully. That's it. I've had enough. From now on I will try to approach her.

This is my first attempt EVER at creative writing. Tell me your thoughts so I can improve!


	2. About Schmidt

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TEEN TITANS

 **TEENAGE DIRTBAG**

CHAPTER 2: ABOUT SCHMIDT

Tonight the guys decided to watch a movie. I love movie nights because it gives me an excuse to be around her. It's Dick's turn to decide what movie we're gonna watch. Hopefully he will choose something that's not My Little Pony, a choice Kori made that Rae seemed to enjoy (yes it was very weird). Dick goes ahead and chooses a movie called `About Schmidt` the story of a retired man that lost his wife. Bird watching it is then. By bird I of course mean Raven, the most beautiful one if you ask me. Sometimes I turn into a raven just to feel that I'm closer to her I some way- I know it's stupid and childish but it makes me feel happy.

The movie starts and everyone is sitting on the couch. Dick's arm is around Kori's shoulders, while Vic is texting furiously, probably Karen. I get so jealous of my friends having girlfriends while I don't. And it's not like I'm not able to find one, since there are blogs online about how hot I am. Once I searched similar blogs for Rae and I nearly punched the screen of my computer.

I suddenly feel her sitting next to me, so close that if I moved my arm I could touch her. She looked at me with a `I don't wanna watch this movie` look and turned to the screen with a slight frown. I chuckled and started taking some popcorn out of her bowl. Our hands touched for a mere second- how cliché- and she looked into my eyes with those beautiful dark orbs of her. She then declared that she is not feeling well and that she will be in her room. I run behind her and into the corridor that leads to our rooms.

`Why don't you wanna watch the movie?` I ask her, worried that the reason is my inexplicable awkwardness.

`I just want to be alone` she replies and nearly slams her door in my face.

`I find the movie boring too, let's do something else, like meditate or something`. The door opens up a bit. `Since when do you care about meditation?` she asked with a raised eyebrow.

`Ummm I just think we don't spend time together although we had promised to become friends, not just teammates`. I say nervously, waiting for the door in my face.

`Fine, meet me on the roof in five`. I just stand there, again, with a goofy victorious smile. I run to the roof and wait until she shows up, wearing a long sleeved black shirt to protect her from the chilly night. Why does she always have to look so hot? Her hair was flowing in the wind around her pale face, making her look like those Renaissance paintings that once she forced me to see in a museum because no one else wanted to go.

`Promise you will be quiet for once`

`I promise, but what do you mean for once?`

She curls her legs under her body and starts floating. I jump up the curve, careless if I fall since I can transform into a bird, and do the same. Her face looks so calm, almost like she is sleeping. How am I supposed to meditate with such a beauty right next to me? Even though I've decided to tell her about my feelings, I have to prepare the ground for a while, so that she won't be thunderstrucked by the news.

`You look very peaceful, how do you do it?`

`By being _quiet_ Garfield` Oh how I love when she calls me by my name. Although I would prefer if she did it in a different situation. Not the time for these thoughts, since she is an empathy and she will probably notice the change of my feelings.

`Is it hard being an empathy? Doesn't it bother you that people fill you with their feelings all the time?`

`I have learned to control it, through _quiet_ meditation`

`I was always curious to ask you, what's my dominant feeling?` She opened her eyes and looked down.

`It's love and friendship and happiness, but sometimes you give some weird vibes, not exactly anger, but something else that I can't identify. Remember, everyone has different feelings so it's natural.`

`Yeah that "anger" you're saying, it's my primal instincts.` Oh shit please don't ask what I mean by that.

`What do you mean?` Anddd of course. What do I reply? Oh you know just thoughts about you on my bed on your stomach being pounded.

`I don't think you wanna know`. Great save you idiot! She makes a weird face and drops the conversation. We spend some time in silence, and then she calls it a night and heads to her room. Maybe mister Schmidt would have saved me from this awkward travesty.

HOPE YOU LIKED THE CHAPTER, DON'T FORGET TO REVIEW! (HUGS YOU BUT NOT FOR TOO LONG BECAUSE I HATE HUMAN CONTACT)


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